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Thread: Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

  1. #1
    Junior Member djungled's Avatar
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    Apr 2005
    South Africa

    Talking Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

    Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?


    Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?

    Just looking for an opinion!
    Tomorrow is one more day closer to the Holidays

  2. #2
    Member mrA's Avatar
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    May 2004
    Tallinn - Estonia
    Them some tricky questions....
    I'll add:

    If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, what does an empty desk mean?


    Can you get cornered in a round room?

  3. #3
    Hardware guy Super Moderator FastGame's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Blasters worm farm
    Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
    infants get the most enjoyment, thats why older adults revert back to infancy

    "Lisp" ? I have no clue nor a lisp, but since there's about 500 words I can't pronounce someone is real "cruel"

  4. #4
    Friendly Neighborhood Super Moderator phishhead's Avatar
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    Apr 2002
    San Diego, Ca.
    I mean think about it all you do is sleep, suck on a boob, and get taken care of 24/7. can life get any better.

  5. #5
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Sheboygan, WI
    I've got a few in an email before.....

    Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll
    squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

    Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna
    eat the next thing that comes outta it's ass."

    Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
    horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

    Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

    If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut,
    why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

    Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't
    point to their ass when they ask where the bathroom is?

    Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are
    going to look up there anyway?

    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
    both dogs!

    What do you call male ballerinas?

    Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?

    If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why
    he just buy dinner?

    If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
    vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

    Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same

    (Stop singing and read on . . .. . . .. . . . . (I know you did)

    Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
    call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?

    Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
    you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the

    Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

    And these are George Carlinisms

    If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several
    times, does he become disoriented?

    If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

    Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?

    If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

    If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

    When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts", and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?

    Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

    Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.

    When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

    Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a
    Person who drives a race car not called a racist?

    Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

    Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

    Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

    "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language.
    Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

    If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

    If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

    Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

    What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald

    I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older, then it dawned on me: They're cramming for their final exam.

    I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

    Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?
    What are we supposed to do, write to them?
    Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they delivered the mail?
    If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

    You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

    No one ever says, "It's only a game", when their team is

    Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

    Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.

    If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

    Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

  6. #6
    Platinum+ Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Okay this one isnt funny and has nothing to do at all with anything but -

    Why does Compact Disc end with a C but Hard Disk end with a K?

    Or did I misspell one of them?

  7. #7
    Triple Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Nope, you didn't...I wonder why its that way...

  8. #8
    Titanium Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    blk helo target, WA
    Quote Originally Posted by djungled
    Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
    Wouldn't we call this pre-mature ejaculation?

  9. #9
    Techzonez Governor Super Moderator Conan's Avatar
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    Apr 2002
    Moved to Fun Stuff.

  10. #10
    Security Intelligence TZ Veteran cash_site's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Software Paradise
    Quote Originally Posted by tarun
    Why does Compact Disc end with a C but Hard Disk end with a K?
    I think there are two spellings for disk/disc... i interchange them freely.. not sure there is a real difference, perhaps only the pedantic grammar teachers will be able to tell you

    All these questions/sayings are pretty funny... sort of like seinfeld jokes too.

    --- 0wN3D by 3gG ---

  11. #11
    Triple Platinum Member hotmale's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Quote Originally Posted by cash_site
    I think there are two spellings for disk/disc...
    You're right. I've just checked WordWeb; hard disk and hard disc are the same. Compact disk and compact disc are both correct as well.

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